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what the voices in my head tell me to write

Tuesday, March 30, 2004

Gym Stereotypes are always fun.

The gym I go to is fairly well mixed. Right from the grunters to housewives. There are always some stereotypes that really stand out.

The first of these is the grunter. Big muscle bound men who lift very heavy weights and do no CV work at all. Tend to have jobs as bouncers or something like that. When they are not working out they pose in front of the mirror or just wander around showing off. They also tend to come in groups.

Next the running freak. These can be male or female. Painfully thin they pound away on a treadmill until either it breaks or their knees explode. They always have this distracted look on their face and appear to be on drugs. Unlike grunters who are all on steroids.

Women on the pull. More of these than you might think. Where else do you get to meet members of the opposite sex wearing little more that a pair of shorts and a vest. These women can be recognised by their almost complete lack of physical activity and the fact that they are the only women in the place wearing make up.

Hyper-fit woman. Wears the latest kit and trainers but its always sweat stained as she works out like a demon. Has a body made of titanium. Scares the hell out of the men in the place. There is only allowed to be one hyper-fit woman in any gym.

The obviously gay couple. Tend to be thin and wear glasses. Work hard on having a body. Only talk to one another in whispers. Often the target of women on the pull.

The two overweight guys in their twenties. These two wear low-cost sports gear or football shirts they think looks great. The want so badly to be grunters. They know every variation of every exercise that involves lifting weights. They spend ages in the gym doing them. They never go anywhere near any CV equipment that is the only real hope of them getting rid of the mounds of fat all over their pasty bodies.

Corporate man or woman. Tend to be very well kitted out, tanned, and not do much apart from hang around talking shop.

The trier. They really want to get in shape. They never will though as they don't have the will power. Tend to spend no more than 5 minutes on any exercise or sit on a bike peddling very slowly for ages.

The geek. Recognised by their t-shirts which they get free at trade fairs.

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